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Lady Reed - Queen Bee Talks 1974

On: Friday, February 5, 2010



01 Side 1
02 Side 2
 

True story

On: Thursday, February 4, 2010

Regarding email lottery or dead relative scams -
Ever notice that it's always the "President" or a "Doctor" but not a banker, lawyer or lottery official who "signs" those emails?
Several years ago I took one of these email scams as far as I could safely take it. As sarcastic as my email replies were ("WHEEE - -  I WON  Send me the BUCKS !!!  HURRY UP!! ") the guy kept emailing me and after a few weeks he changed addresses and was emailing me minute by minute, coaxing me to go to my bank and get the  bank manager on the phone. In my last email I told him I was heading out the door to go to the bank and "I've fallen and I can't get up". Apparently that catchphrase was not within his Americana experience (he didn't get it) so he insisted that I get to the bank before this opportunity slipped away. Since there was no way for him to hear me laughing or to see my hand-gestures I junk-mailed him and ended it. True story!

John Valby - Half In The Fuckin' Bag 2005

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Orson Welles - Begatting Of The President 1969

01 L B Jenesis
02 The Defoliation Of Eden
03 Burn, Pharaoh, Burn
04 The Coming Of Richard
05 The Pacification Of Goliath
06 Paradise Bossed
07 The Raising Of Richard
08 The Book Of Hubert
09 The Ascension

G-R-E-A-T... N-E-W-S

I got some great news today. I will be getting a new high performance PC upon my return from... drumroll... the sunny beaches of Aruba! 
Dr Harry Raymond (ap_gmbd@youdumbshit.com) has informed me today that I have won £1,532.720.00GBP in the UK Electronics Award!!! 
As soon as I dig up my bank account number and send the good doctor my social security number I will be ON MY WAY ! My luck has finally turned.
Cheers, losers!! Send you a postcard!!
Jim

File storage

On: Wednesday, February 3, 2010

You probably saw the poll results - about 2/3 of those who responded would like to continue having the 2nd link, the S-h-a-r-e-b-e-e link. I will continue to make S-h-a-r-e-bee links available.
{Private thought balloon} Of course, they may lead to a Hare Krishna site so those buggers should use them at their own risk. I remember seeing those Hare Krishna folks on street corners when I was a teenager. They always chanted especially for me, indeed right at me, and even invited me to dance with them more than once. Perhaps they knew I was a sinner, perhaps they knew I was high and they were trying to FREAK ME OUT. Or perhaps it was my clothes, I was into robes, or my bald head. Maybe it was my finger tambourines.  Anyway, I would straight-arm the closest one and head for the head shop to get my strawberry incense and "tobacco papers."
Anyway, I will continue to submit links to r-a-p-i-d-s-h-a-r-e, I do have a premium account, the files are setup as "trafficshare" files (they will immediately download for you even if you don't have an account.) I regularly refresh my r-a-p-i-d-s-h-a-r-e files - I run a report which indicates which files have not been downloaded for a long time, and download them once to start the 60 day expiration timer over again.)
I will be investigating which service holds their inactive files longer and may make a service change this year. Anyone with experience one way or the other let me know. It's a pet peeve of mine - I hate visiting sites with long expired links, like a catholic school girl, friggin' teases!
I've been looking into getting a widget which will indicate on the posts which links are dead - right in the post. I found a couple of standalone apps which will tell you the same, and a few are pretty neat. But I think I would prefer the "dead link" comment right in the post.  Anyway - if you've got a gadget or widget or whozit that does that drop me a line.
Jim


I am sorry if I offended anyone in the group who is or plans to be a member of Hare Krishna. I also apologize to those who were spiritually involved in a former incarnation. And no, I am not bald.

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Mort Sahl - A Way Of Life 1959

Mort Sahl
Morton Lyon Sahl
Montreal, Quebec, Canada
May 11 1927 -


01 Sahl's Disease, Doctors and Pills
02 Vegas, The Mob, a Sick Comic Gets Married
03 The Academy Awards and The Short Film
04 The 'Operation' and the AMA
05 Billy Graham
06 The Berlin Crisis (Start)
07 Castro in Washington
08 Actors on the Health Kick
09 Berlin (cont), Democracy in Greece
10 A Madam's Trial, Sororities
11 Ms. Luce and the Yalta Papers
12 The DAR, The UN and Israel
 
 







***
Thanks Dr Forrest's Cheeze Factory!
His other material on this blog is "tagged" at the bottom of this post

WANTED
Nixon's Odyssey (45)
Watergate (45)

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Blogging

On: Tuesday, February 2, 2010

I made a commitment to myself to make this blog more like a blog this year, to wit I will insert more posts which include comments of my own. And since this is a vintage comedy blog, my comments will be damm funny and, well, old. My style is a combination of Jackie Vernon's and Steven Wright's with perhaps some Emo Philips tossed in when I can work up some twisted irony.
Basically you can depend on dry and (my kids tell me) corny comments. I know that while you read my posts you risk waking up the wifey, who is probably feigning sleep to fend off your advances, but keep your guffaws to a minimum. Don't want you to laugh so hard that you draw the attention of the folks at LAUGH.COM.
{Private thought balloon} and for godssakes, get a life and stop perusing blogs at 2 in the morning.
Jim

Woody Allen - Woody Allen (Recorded Live at Mr. Kelly's Chicago) 1964

01 Side 1 Recorded Live at Mr. Kelly's, Chicago
02 Side 2 Recorded Live at Mr. Kelly's, Chicago
Thanks Dr Forrest's Cheeze Factory!

Welcome To 2010

On: Monday, February 1, 2010

Hope everyone enjoyed the New Year holiday. . .
Now that 2010 is in full swing I'm dropping a note to let you know what's coming up this year.
I'll continue posting 2 albums a day. At that rate I will be able to post material already in my queue for another 3 months. I am optimistic that I will find new material on my own in the months to come but, as you can imagine, it's getting harder to find. On the other hand, "many hands make small work" and if you have anything to submit to the blog all the members will have one more day of laughs. On that subject, here's a big
"THANK YOU"
to those folks who have already sent me links to expand our blog. You'll see many of their posts in the weeks to come.
The blog is "private" now with 54 members. I will probably continue to make the blog public on random weekends to acquire new members to meet the Blogger limit of 100. Don't be afraid to send the email address of like-minded folks that would be interested in this type of blog.
Finally, just a quick mention that we have at least 2 members who are aspiring or professional comedians. I am pleased that those two members have the potential to gain some pointers on delivery styles and material from the old greats (and indeed the old crappy comedians.) Good luck, guys.
Jim

George Carlin - Parental Advisory, Explicit Lyrics 1990

George Carlin
George Denis Patrick Carlin
New York, New York USA
May 12 1937 - Jun 22 2008
Official Site

01 Offensive Language
02 I Ain't Afraid of Cancer
03 Some People Are Stupid
04 Rape Can Be Funny
05 Feminist Blowjob
06 Good Ideas
07 Things You Never See
08 Things You Never Hear
09 Things You Don't Wanna Hear
10 Life's Little Moments
11 I Love My Dog
12 Organ Donor Programs
13 Don't Pull the Plug on Me
14 They're Only Words
15 Euphemisms







George Carlin - Life Is Worth Losing 2006

George Carlin
George Denis Patrick Carlin
New York, New York USA
May 12 1937 - Jun 22 2008 age 71
Official Site
01 A Modern Man
02 Three Little Words
03 The Suicide Guy
04 Extreme Human Behavior
05 The All-Suicide TV Channel
06 Dumb Americans
07 Pyramid of the Hopeless
08 Autoerotic Asphyxia
09 Posthumous Female Transplants
10 Yeast Infection
11 Coast-To-Coast Emergency
Life Is Worth Losing



George Carlin & Friends - George Carlin & Friends Roast Arnold Schwarzenegger 2009

George Carlin
George Denis Patrick Carlin
New York, New York USA
May 12 1937 - Jun 22 2008
Official Site


01 George Carlin
02 Milton Berle
03 Pat McCormick
04 Sid Caesar
05 Red Buttons
06 Arnold Schwarzenegger Roasts The Roasters






 

George Carlin - Little David Years (1971-1977) Bonus Disc 1999

George Carlin
George Denis Patrick Carlin
New York, New York USA
May 12 1937 - Jun 22 2008 age 71
Official Site


01 George's Disc Jockey Theme And Show Opening
02 Tattoos
03 Hitchhiking (Short Version)
04 Clerks, Hankies & Emma
05 Elmo's Song-Johnny Badcheck
06 Monopoly
07 New Sports
08 Hitchhiking (Long Version)
09 Guacamole
10 Nuts In Cake & Toenail Clippings
11 400,000 American Musical Favorites
12 Peas
13 Losing Your Place
14 I'm Musical
15 Lost & Found
16 Public Affairs
17 Snapper Lawn Mowers
18 How To Handle A Heckler
19 Closing
20 The Coney Island Recordings




George Carlin - You Are All Diseased 1999

George Carlin
George Denis Patrick Carlin
New York, New York USA
May 12 1937 - Jun 22 2008
Official Site

01 How's Everybody Doin'?
02 Airport Security
03 Fear Of Germs
04 Cigars
05 Angels
06 Harley Davidson
07 House Of Blues
08 Minority Language, A-Happens To Be B-Openly C-Urban D-Girlfriend
09 Man Stuff A-Slugfest B-Cut-Off Sleeves C-Barbed Wire Tattoo ...
10 Kids And Parents, Children Are Overrated, They're Not All Cute
11 TV Tonight, A-Playboy Channel B-Jerry Springer C-Little House ...
12 Names
13 Adventuring Lullabye
14 American Bullshit
15 Businessmen
16 Religion
17 There Is No God



.........Click "Older Posts" link, above, to see, umm, Older Posts. Yeah.